But when someone seems too good to be true, they usually are.

Tonight was crazy. An extreme amount of inspiration. Pass the buck was exactly what I needed. It was spiritual, but fun too. Austin and Spencer made sure that we were always laughing. Is it crazy that after a year of complaining about council, I'm going to miss it? These really were amazing people. We had our differences, and it sucks that we weren't best friends, but they are amazing people. And I'm always going to consider them friends. Most of all I'm grateful for brother sullivan. I went to him with a broken heart, a low self esteem, and other various problems. And he listened to me. And he gave me a blessing. And he helped me to get through it. I know that he prayed for me, and I am so thankful for his prayers. I bore my testimony and I was amazing by what I was saying. I don't think when I bear my testimony, it just kinda comes out. I go up there believing, and while I am saying it, I know it. You gain a testimony while testifying. I talked about the opposition that I had, but how I still knew that I was called of God. I know I was. And I don't care if Aubrey still doesn't think I'm good enough or whatever, that's between her and god, because I know he wanted me. I just wish it wouldn't have taken me all year to realize that. But maybe that was the point. I am so thankful that I was able to pass my book to Bailey. I knew it was supposed to go to her all along. The night I got it, I had a feeling that it would go to her. All the notes, pictures, and other nonsense, I did knowing she would see it. I like that feeling. I feel like I had a crazy awesome revelation. Or at least a really good gut feeling. I have some amazing people in my life. For some reason, Austin, Nick, and Spencer influenced me so much this year. I am so glad that I got to serve with them. I hope we still stay friends. Our seminary video was awesome. It was the perfect amount of memories. Stuff I'd forgotten, but were amazing none the least. I honestly don't regret taking my calling to seminary council. Sometimes, it was just the shove I needed. Like my first pass the buck, the one tonight, when I had to speak and I had the flu, our hike up ensign peak, pizza pullaparts at Maryann's house. I needed those moments. And I needed to have people make those judgments about me. Because now I have a stronger testimony of how we need to love everyone. How everyone is a child of god. Sometimes, I'll walk down the halls and I'll see someone I don't know, but I'll still feel a huge amount of love for them because I know they are my brother or sister and I know that God loves them too. If you don't feel that, you've got a lot of soul searching to do. Our video was set to John Schmidt's love story. That song has so much meaning to me. And it helped me realize something. I wanted to call Eric and tell him about it because I really need to tell him something that is long overdue. I couldn't though. And I know he has no reason to do so, but I hope that by some slim chance, he reads this and calls me. It's not to yell at you by the way. But I have something I need to tell you, because the spirit is telling me that I need to.

And I am, whatever you say I am. If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? I don't know, it's just the way I am.