Forget all the regrets that are bound to follow.

Today was nothing special. I went to work. I got raped. I went shopping. Yeah, that's right, I got raped. By a FOUR YEAR OLD. I was on break, just chillin in the food court. When a little boy just shoved his hand up my dress. So, instinct had me hit his hand away. His mom looked at me like I was a bitch, didn't say anything, and walked away. No 'Sorry my son just raped you' no 'ohmygod I'm so sorry' just walked away...
Came home and watched Titanic <3 something different hits me every time "we couldn't find any records on Jack" Jack was completely forgotten in this world, but look at what he did. He saved Rose in every single way possible. Even though he wasn't remembered, even though there wasn't a single picture of him left in this world, he made a difference. I was always so afraid of being forgotten. I shouldn't be though. Who cares if the difference I make doesn't force me to be remembered, as long as I make a difference. When Jack meets Rose at the clock at the very end it always makes me cry the hardest. Because he told her to make it count and meet him at the clock. And she did. She made it count and he waited for her. AND I DON'T CARE THAT THIS IS JUST A MOVIE. I know that this existed. Maybe not them exactly, but that love, that dedication, and that eternal choice that made a difference. Before I die, I hope I find this love. Even if it's just a few hours before I die, I just hope to find it.
Yesterday I had lunch with Nate again. But he decided to be a douchebag and was like 'use your stalker skills to find me' So I looked like a SKETCH wandering around the cafeteria looking for a boy wearing red. IT WAS A RED HAT!!! He should have told me to look for white!!! I just wish he didn't have a girlfriend :(
Mike makes me cry. Because yesterday it hit me. That this is all for real. That he's dying. That he's not the same healthy rambunctious boy that he used to be. And I know it's hitting him too. The way he looks at the world is different now, like he's trying to take it all in and remember every second. I remember when he was the proudest boy I've ever met of his stupid hair and now it's just there. I remember he worked out so hard to have muscles because he wanted to get a tattoo and have it look good. Now he can't even do that because of risk of infection. It's like everything was taken from him because of this. I know Drake sees it too, how bad it's getting. And he tries not to act different, but he walks a little closer to Mike in case he falls, he doesn't go out as much. They're still bros, they still laugh and compete and mess with each other, but it has to be more careful. It's not fair that someone so full of life is having it taken from them. It's not fair. 'Adri, you remind me of glitter. You stick to everything like nobodies business and you look annoyingly pretty the whole time' Makin my way downtown <3
Last exorcist is not my thing :| sketchy sketchy disturbing garbage :|