Crayola skies for a thousand miles

'I promise, Adri. You changed my life. And you will always be remembered by me as the girl who inspired me to love.'
'I know you do, but you're stronger than you think. You don't need a guy to feel wanted and loved, tons of people love you. People depend on you, you brighten their days, and guys who can't see how amazing you are don't deserve you. But I promise that one day you'll find a guy who thinks that he doesn't deserve you and will treat you like you deserve. You just have to go through the bad to get the good. God can't openly play favorites.'
'Ha well if you think it can work, make it work but if you aren't totally in love with each other and you just wanna have fun, life is too short to waste on shitty relationships.'
'If you haven't found a happy ending yet it means nothing. It's not the end.'

'Stop being such a goddamn pussy. Stop saying no and start saying yes. Swear when you want to, kiss whoever, and fuck those who hate you. Wear what you want, say what you want, and say fuck it when everything falls apart. Have sex, get kissed, get dirty, get drunk, smoke pot, and smoke a little more. Fuck people, fuck the leader of the world, fuck your parents, fuck your teachers, fuck your siblings, fuck everyone. Because in no time you'll be old and wrinkly, with grandkids on the way, wishing you didn't give a shit when you were younger. So hold your head high and say I don't care, because what hurts other people the most is seeing you happy and not worrying about a thing.' That's the worst best advice I've ever gotten. It's the thought that counts though.
The best thing through all of this is how skinny I'm getting :) just in time for prom! I hope and pray that Zak can get the day off because I know I'll have an amazing time with him :)
I actually feel happy right now :) peaceful. Ready to let come what may. Ready to let go if I have to even if I don't want to. I don't blame you for the breakup in any way, but you did break my heart even more than he did to be completely honest. I know you didn't mean to, but it happened and it's ok. Because everything happens for a reason and I'm already starting to be grateful that it happened. I'm learning a lot. About life, about others, about love, and most of all about myself. Thank you. All of you. Even if we aren't, we'll be best friends forever.
I just need a few coloring books to get through all this. xxxxxxxx

I'll stop hurting once the pain goes away.

'will I be the same after this?
No... You'll be so much stronger'

I can't stop thinking about Vern. Poor aunt Jerry. Poor little Jimmy. I don't want to go to a funeral any time soon. It would just be one more thing that I can't handle.

I can't sleep more than five hours anymore. Ever. My body is just too used to not doing it. I can't sleep I can't eat. I can't be bothered with putting effort into anything anymore. I miss you. When you would come over all the time to surprise me. When I would tell you that I look like Jizz and you would say that you didn't give a flying fuck and you would come over anyways. I miss the walks we would take to your castle. Holding hands and you trying to teach me how to skip. I miss the moments where we would just lay in the grass or under that tree and just look at the sky. I miss the time we watched titanic and we just held eachother crying. I miss you cooking for me (bitch in the kitchen ;)) I miss playing crappy rockband with your family. I miss the nonstop texts you would send me at night even though I never replied. I even miss listening to nevershoutnever in your car. I miss our Justin bieber jokes and all the stupid things I would call you. I miss burlap and fairy Eric and Erica. I miss going to McDonalds with you to get happy meals. I miss rainbow dash. I miss every cute text you ever sent me. I miss the surprise flowers. I miss the notes we would write. I miss our walks in the rain. I miss the feeling of being loved. I miss you telling me that I was the most beautiful girl you'd ever seen. I miss you telling me how much you loved me and how much I meant to you. I miss you being my best friend in the whole entire world. I miss the empty promises we would make and the sweet nothings we would whisper. I miss you being MY secret. I miss you.

I deserve to at least know the truth.
Because tonight that's all I told.
Thank god for my mom. I'm glad she knows everything now

No big deal. Colton just witnessed me yell my brains out, drop wayy too many 'f-bombs', and almost cry. He's a really good guy and I can see me, him, jordan, and desi being really good friends. I had fun with them. Playing kinect and going to wendy's. I like them.
I miss mitchell. i can't avoid saying it anymore.
goodnight xxxx

I've never had this many people be afraid of me in my whole life ever. Mwahaha.

I saw a biker get hit by a car. And it literally brought tears to my eyes. I don't even know them. But it broke my heart for them.